March 19th, 2012

March 17th was the worst day I've had in a while. In the evening I just... felt so... I can't even describe it. It was horrific and really fucking scary because I didn't want to sleep, eat, breathe, see, think, feel. I just wanted to be nothing and although I feel that way all the time, this was definitely something else. It's just.... ugh honestly I don't know if I can handle anything any more. I'm supposed to be going to school at 11.25 but I'm so panicky and feel like throwing up and ugh I just, no no no. I don't want to. I really really really don't want to and nobody understands just how hard it is. I'm going to force myself to do some Geography work and then I'll... I don't know. We'll see when my mum gets home. I just have nothing and ugh I fucking give up.